Rugby World Cup: Downloads and Team Profiles

Are you worried you’re not completely up with the goings on with the Rugby World Cup? Then check out these downloads. Get a Rugby World Cup countdown widget (the image can be changed), excel spreadsheets to update as the scores come in, dates to your outlook calendar and for NZ rugby fans: the Rugby World Cup TV3 schedule (thanks MiramarMike for this).

If you’re still sitting on the fence and you’re not sure who you want to support as we head into the final week’s countdown, take a peek at ruggerblogger’s Rugby World Cup Team profiles. I’ve still got a few to add to the collection but if you’re interesting in reading about the Springbok chances, the Wallaby woes, Scotland's steel, the weak link of England or the chiropractor of Samoa, then here is where it’s at. Happy downloading.

Rugby World Cup Finalists....

I’m as one eyed as the next New Zealander and I think that the All Blacks will reach the final. (translation, I pray they will be in the final). The question is – who will be the other team to make it for the last dance on 22 October? After the poor showing of Ireland in the last couple of Rugby World Cup friendlies, people have all but written them off. But are they really that bad? Will the Pumas and Les Bleus string them alive - or is this just wishful thinking for some people? Meanwhile, as much as everyone has dissed the English, there is something about them that might suggest they’re coming into form. (Ok, there is nothing to suggest that at the moment but I don’t like being mean).

Meanwhile the Southern Hemisphere media is (some might say arrogantly) consumed with the fact that France and the Tri Nations teams are the only true challengers. The question is – out of France, South Africa and Australia – who will be the team to make the final? Will France blow a gasket; South Africa a punch and Stirling a forward pass? Which one of these teams is guaranteed a spot in Rugby World Cup history?

The weird and wonderful rugby world of hair

There are a bevy of beauties on the rugger field, each with their own special trademark. Although I would hate to categorise any team by country, it has been noted that the Welsh, when not sporting the woolly Duncan Jones sheep look, seem to be attempting some kind of Guinness record when it comes to the amount of hair gel to apply to their locks. This does for old Gav what countless other beauties have found in their time – over use of the bryl cream gives ultimate lift of the hair follicle but ultimately, also an increased reputation that you can’t have hair and brains too.

In the All Blacks camp, apart from the obvious dreadlocks, there is a fond predisposition to dying the edges of the hair yellow. Jerry Collin’s cousin (also his hairdresser) looks to be doing a rip roaring trade for half the All Black team with Neemia Tialata, dropped Piri Weepu and Ma’a Nonu plus Chris Masoe all sporting their fairer edges.

Meanwhile, England and the Wallabies are content to wear their hair the way real rugby men do – with short backs and sides. That is of course unless you’re Dallaglio. The man who loves the media bite almost as much as the sound of his own voice could possibly be the only geezer in the world looking to inspire a revival of the comb over. Much like Lol’s rugby time on the rugby field – it sadly isn’t tipped to be around for much longer.

Are the wheels coming off the Irish Wagon before the Rugby World Cup?

Ireland 23 - Italy 20

How can this be? Was this the luck of the Irish coming into play? Ireland dubiously won against a fired up Italy in the dying minutes of Saturday’s ‘friendly’. Some parts of the British media are saying the Azzuri may feel aggrieved the TMO Derek Bevan awarded Ronan O’Gara a fumbled try off an alleged forward pass as the clock ran into full time.

Eddie O’Sullivan must be slightly worried that without Brian O’Driscoll, the Irish team appear to be faltering on the home straight – just under two weeks now before the Rugby World Cup kicks off. The Italians shunted the Irish pack around the field, had superior defence and disrupted a disjointed Irish backline (missing the centre magic). In what was expected to be a walkover, the Irish stumbled but didn’t strive against the underrated Italians.

Some are saying Ireland’s weak showing in these build up games is a blessing, because resting on their laurels they will not be when the crunch games kick off next month. I think they have reason to panic. Without BOD they are looking increasingly one dimensional and Eddie O’Sullivan and co must consider themselves lucky to get away with this win over the weekend.

Rage against the All Black machine

In the meantime, the All Blacks Rugby World Cup campaign is gathering apace – that is, gathering critics left, right and centre apace. McQueen, Latham and Rob Andrew have all taken a pot shot at the men in black this week, criticising them for being one dimensional etc. Laporte is calling them cheats (yawn) and the latest comes from good old Phil Kearns. Apparently the All Blacks are ‘worried’. The great orator himself believes ‘they’ve peaked too soon’. Oooh, now THAT is breaking news.

The only question is – who will next emerge from the dressing room with arms swinging, taking aim at Richie and his hapless, one dimensional motley crew. No doubt Wales, Ireland, Argentina and Scotland will be getting their ducks in line. Eddie Jones, nestled in the bosom of the Springbok camp, has been quiet for about a whole three days and is also overdue for a rant. Odds are on too for Sir Clive to pop his little shiny head up through the parapet and make a few snivelling sounds. And that great pie eater of the UK Sunday Times, aka Stephen ‘the All Blacks are a bunch of meanies and nobody likes them’ Jones, will no doubt enjoy a few blats out soon at the boys in black.

Rugby World Cup: great blogs and links

The ruckosphere of blogging is a wonderful thing. You just need to trawl through the message boards and fanzine sites to check out the plethora of news and information – some articles balanced with informative debate, statistics and facts; at the other end of the scale -the meatheads of the ‘my team’s better than your team’ variety, screeching away to fanatical proportions. Sexist drivel; good old fashioned humour; anger; statistics, and mourning. It’s all there. Want to be an unofficial citing official? Trawl YouTube. Want to release a Rugby World Cup hit song? Then MySpace is the answer.

This week with a little over two weeks to go and the Rugby World Cup has captured the hearts and minds of hundreds of different bloggers. Each with their own take on what makes rugby, erm, well… rugby. Worried about the beer on tap in France – check out Matt at Green and Gold Rugby. You want to debate the finer points of the bottom tier nations and who might come away with the most wins? Then nursedude is your man - delving into the finer points of US and Portuguese rugby stamina. MirimarMike always has a great summation (with links) of what is going on in the weird and wonderful world of the egg shaped ball. Total Flanker isn't a great fan of the haka, but what can you say? He is a true blue English gentleman with rugby in his loosie soul. For a touch of the liberal rugger bloke in New Zealand, then the Dropkicks are your answer. And for a female take on rugby? Then check out my sisters blogging at kiwirugby and blondie. As you will be able to tell, these witty writers and seething scribes put the local print media to shame. The ruckosphere is alive, and prodigiously punting.

And if you’ve got a link you think I might be interested in – please do let me know….

Rugby World Cup : Latest shock from Ireland

‘Shock as Brian O’Driscoll is revealed as next Harry Potter!’ reveals Fred Frogley; magic and rugby correspondent of the Galway First. A Potter specialist close to BOD’s manager confirmed last night: “This scar mysteriously appeared overnight and has singled out this Muggle as the new one to lead us against the forces of darkness.”. Meanwhile, Mikaera Tewhata, rugby player turned boxer, anxiously exclaims ‘I want to call BOD to apologise’ for the punch last week that threatened to end the Irish captain’s 2007 Rugby World Cup campaign. Unfortunately for Mikaera, BOD instructed BT to place a toll bar on all New Zealand rugby players in fear they may threaten to break any more bones in his already battle worn body. So Tewhata will just have to make do with apologizing the Tana Umaga way: through telepathy.

Meanwhile, down in New Zealand....

Jim Kayes of the Dom Post is all in a lather after the Rugby World Cup schedule was announced for 2011. It appears both semis and the final will play in the upgraded, purpose built for the occasion, Eden Park. In other words, Auckland will be getting the good games. 'Auckland hogs Rugby World Cup hosting!' Jim huffs away angrily. Meanwhile, the Stuff website angrily derides those naughty and selfish Aucklanders with a poll - that kind of highlights they haven’t found a good rugby story for a few days:

How do you feel about Auckland getting the major games of the 2011 Rugby World Cup?
1. Gutted.
2. They should be spread around more.
3. Makes sense

All I can say is – who cares - and more importantly - what loser would be gutted about this? It’s in 2011. Can we stop sniping at each other for even half an hour?! And wasn’t Auckland hosting the major World Cup games always going to be a no-brainer? Obviously not, for some factions of the gutted (and rather pathetic) New Zealand media.

Defence or Attack to win the Rugby World Cup?

Peter Bills of the Independent on Sunday described England’s attack in the aftermath of their loss to France as ‘about as cutting edge as a Yorkshire pudding’.

I wasn’t able to watch live the ‘rugby friendly’ where the French overturned the English 22 - 9 in Marseilles but I did tune into watch this game on replay the following day. Is it just me or when you already know the score and are not really emotionally invested in the team you’re watching, the rugby is slightly boring? I found this game boring anyway. There seemed to be a fair bit of niggle and not a lot of invention. Admittedly France did score a try – but just the one.

Defence structures across all top tier teams at the moment seem so good now that backlines can’t seem to attain any flow off set piece moves. The teams that can actually score tries appear happier to feed off the mistakes of the opposition and wait to counter attack. It has been stated many times that this World Cup will be won on defence. I would prefer to think that a team that can attack with flair and score tries off different plays on the rugby field will be lifting old Bill. For this reason I would rather see Australia, Ireland, Wales or New Zealand get to the final stages of the tournament over the likes of South Africa or England who are always too content to kick, kick, kick and play the ten man game. The jury for me is still out on France. I don’t believe they have been tested enough and the wheels may come off for them, particularly with that loose canon coach and some half decent opposition.

Brian O’Driscoll injured again (due to New Zealand rugby thug)

I felt pretty bad for Brian O’Driscoll when I heard that he had been the victim of foul play against some rugby thug in France during a World Cup warm up match. Bad, but secretly relieved that he hadn’t suffered the fractured sinus and lacerated face on NZ terra firma. Thank god, I thought. He won’t be calling up his publishers and putting poison pen to paper again on his outlook concerning those cheating, spear tackling kiwi rugby players.

So I was a bit horrified to discover the culprit in Bayonne wasn’t a French man at all, but yes; a New Zealander. The British press no doubt will have a field day with the fact that Makaera Tewhata is of course a Maori from the land of the long white cloud. I wouldn’t be surprised if soon there was a conspiracy theory floated after this regarding the NZRFU paying off New Zealand rugby players abroad to target potential threats to the All Blacks. Poor old BOD must feel that he is always in the firing line and I finally concede that he has some right to feel bitter.

It is terrible for O’Driscoll less than a month out from the Rugby World Cup tournament. I admit I did not like him after the witch hunt launched on Tana Umaga during the 2005 British & Irish Lions tournament (helped along of course by Alastair Campbell; a man who as far as I’m concerned has Iraqi blood on his hands, and the ever snivelling ‘Sir’ Clive). O’Driscoll of course had a right to feel disappointed and aggrieved, but as a one eyed New Zealand rugby supporter, I do feel that the spear tackle in that tournament was indeed very dangerous (proven by a dislocated shoulder), but not intentional.

However, with brainless idiots like Tewhata bringing shame on us, his people, and acting as he has done this week, I wouldn’t blame O’Driscoll and Irish rugby supporters for feeling anger towards New Zealand rugby. I just hope BOD can recover in time for the tournament, because without him, it will be a lesser event.

Rugby World Cup Team Profile - New Zealand

Current World Rank: 1

Random cliché: The All Blacks are chokers

Murray Mexted likely to say of them: ‘Their zinzanian moves move me to tears’

Stephen Jones likely to say of them: ‘They won by 50 points but the opposition was pitiful and they poached all their star players from the Pacific Islands’.

Headline most likely in local rag after defeat: Stone the coach

Glamour boy of the team: Daniel Carter

Greatest Moment (in last four years): Humbled the British and Irish Lions in 2005 (and Alastair Campbell in the process)

Worst Moment (in last four years): Thrashed by SA in Tri Nations decider in Durban 2004 (oh, and the wee matter of a world cup semi final against Australia in 2003)

Redeeming Features: Byron Kelleher's haka. Panto but passionate.

Weak link: Line out

Incumbent star: Carl Hayman

Rising star: Brendon Leonard

Rugby World Cup Team Profile - South Africa

Current World Rank: 4

Biggest cliché about the team: ‘They don’t travel well’.

Murray Mexted (NZ Sky commentator) likely to say: "Both sides are here to play rugby."

Stephen Jones did say: "South Africa remain on course to take New Zealand to the wire."

Coach most likely to say in defeat: "That was our second string team anyway…."

Glamour boy of the team: Percy Montgomery

Greatest Moment: Beating the All Blacks in 2005 and 2006 in separate matches of the Tri Nations series

Weakest Moment: Losing to a depressed and depleted England side in the 2006 Autumn International by 3 points and being thrashed by Australia 49 – 0 in the first Tri Nations match of 2006.

Weak link in the team: Percy Montgomery

Redeeming features: Nelson Mandela’s continued support

Incumbent stars: Schalk Burger, Victor Matfield, Bryan Habana

Rugby World Cup Team Profile - Wales

Current World Rank: 8

Random cliché: Welsh backline flair

Murray Mexted likely to say: "He who hesitates......is lost."

Stephen Jones likely to say: ‘I pity them’

Coach most likely to say in defeat: ‘Judge me by the world cup’

Glamour boy of the team: The Jones brothers… for the hair alone

Greatest Moment: Winning the Six Nations in 2005

Weakest Moment: Thrashed at the hands of England by a near 60 points last weekend.

Redeeming features: The hair dos and fake tan - adding a touch of glamour

Weak link: Gavin Henson

Incumbent star: JPR Williams

Rising star: James Hook

Scotland beat Ireland in Rugby World Cup Friendly

What great news to hear that Scotland beat Ireland this weekend in a World Cup friendly in Murrayfield. No matter how the Irish might go on about their second string team (yawn), the Scottish still showed some serious firepower to contend with Brian O’Driscoll and Geordan Murphy in the backline plus gave an evenly fought battle against one of the (arguably) better lineouts in world rugby consisting of Jerry Flannery, Paul O’Connell, Malcolm O’Kelly. Might be time for a little soul searching for Ireland and some serious celebrating for the Scots. Have they timed their peak to perfection?

World Cup Team Profile - Scotland

Scotland

Current World Rank: no.11

Random cliché: granny gate

Murray Mexted likely to say of them: "I don't like this new law, because your first instinct when you see a man on the ground is to go down on him."

Stephen Jones likely to say of them: They’re not exactly playing like William Wallace

Glamour boy of the team: Sean Lamont

Greatest Moment: Beating France in last year's six nations

Weakest Moment: wooden spoon winners too many times to be comfortable with

Redeeming features: Princess Anne seems a loyal supporter even when the chips are down

Weak link in the team: Scottish belief

Incumbent star: Chris Paterson

Rising star: Dan Parks

Rugby World Cup Team Profile - Samoa

Current World Rank: 10

Random cliché: They would be so good if it wasn’t for that evil empire New Zealand poaching all their best players

Murray Mexted (esteemed NZ commentator) likely to say of them: "There's nothing that a tight forward likes more than a loosie right up his backside"

Stephen Jones did say of them: England are in the same pool in France 2007. It will be a frightening thought for them that thanks to the Tuilagi seniors back in Samoa, thanks to the pride and passion of Samoan players in the world and Leicestershire, the stirring sight of Alesana Tuilagi on the charge is simply the harbinger of a wider danger

Glamour boy of the team: Well according to Stephen Jones – it is Alesana Tuilagi.

Greatest Moment: Taking England to the wire in the 2003 quarter final. If it wasn’t for Jonny kicking over some metromic drop goals in the dying minutes, England wouldn’t be world cup winners today (or would they?)

Weak link in the team: occasional acts of random violence in the middle of an international test match doesn't often help the team's cause.

Incumbent star: coach and all round rugby great, Michael Jones.

All out star: Brian 'The Chiropractor' Lima making his fifth world cup? Respect

Rugby World Cup team profile - Australia

In this lull before the Rugby World Cup, I have decided to follow the lead of fellow esteemed bloggers and publish my thoughts on each top ten team heading into the World Cup Competition and what I think their chances are. Here are my thoughts on Australia:

Current World Rank: 2!

Random cliché: Only fools would write off the Wallabies - those buggers fight to the death...

Murray Mexted likely to say: "There's nothing that a tight forward likes more than a loosie right up his backside"

Stephen Jones did say: the Wallabies were again unconvincing in the scrum and were never ruthless enough

Main headlines of the local rag when they lose: 'What's rugby and who cares'

Glamour boy of the team: Matt Dunning

Greatest Moment in last four years: Beating the All Blacks in the 2007 Tri Nations

Weakest Moment: The Australian front row for the last four years.

Redeeming features: George Gregan and his constant handy hints to the referree

Weak link: Matt Dunning

Incumbent star: Stirling Mortlock (or as NZers like to call him 'that bloody Mortlock again')

Rising star: Adam Ashley-Cooper

Rugby World Cup Profiles - France

In this lull before the Rugby World Cup, I have decided to follow the lead of fellow esteemed bloggers and publish my thoughts on each top ten team heading into the World Cup Competition and what I think their chances are. Here are my thoughts on France:

Current World Rank: 3

Random cliché: ‘Who knows which French team will turn up on the day’ and ‘they’re very enigmatic’

Murray Mexted most likely to say: "You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that."

Stephen Jones did say: ‘France, in many senses are a shadow of themselves’.

Coach likely to say in defeat: ‘You will never referee in this town again!’

Glamour boy of the team: Sebastien Chabal

Greatest Moment in last four years: Have had a lion like grip on the Six Nations trophy three years out of four.

Weakest Moment: The hammering suffered at the hands of the All Blacks on home turf both in 2004 and 2006

Weak link in the team: Frederick Michalek

Redeeming features: Bernard Laporte – if you’re going to play bad rugby and send along a C team, at least you’ve got a mad coach to liven things at the post match press conference.

Incumbent star: Dimitri Yachvili

Rising star: Pierre Mignoni

Rugby World Cup Profiles - England

In this lull before the Rugby World Cup, I have decided to follow the lead of fellow esteemed bloggers and publish my thoughts on each top ten team heading into the World Cup Competition and what I think their chances are. Here are my thoughts on England:

Current World Rank: no.7

Random cliché: Dad’s army

Murray Mexted likely to say of them: "He's looking for some meaningful penetration into the backline."

Stephen Jones likely to say of them: ‘England play rugby as it should be played, with attrition and dominance up front. The rest of the world – take heed.’

Main headlines of the local rag when they lose: 'We was robbed'.

Glamour boy of the team: Laurence Dallaglio

Greatest Moment in the last four years: Winning the 2003 Rugby World cup

Weakest Moment: Becoming world chumps in the following four years

Redeeming features: Andy Robinson – he let the rest of the world walk away with it.

Weak link: Andy Farrell

Incumbent star: Jonny who?

Rising star: Matthew Tait

Final lesson: Never trust a man in rugby circles that says his name is Andy

Rugby World Cup Profiles - Ireland

In this lull before the Rugby World Cup, I have decided to follow the lead of fellow esteemed bloggers and publish my thoughts on each top ten team heading into the World Cup Competition and what I think their chances are. Here are my thoughts on Ireland:

Current World Rank: 5

Random cliché: The pluck of the Irish

Murray Mexted most likely to say: ‘Everyone knows I’ve been pumping Gordon D’Arcy for a couple of seasons now’

Stephen Jones did say: ‘Ireland has a feeble scrum, weak scrum-half and undermanned lineout and unbalanced back row’ (ouch – don’t hold back Mr. Jones)

Main headline in the local rag when they lose: ‘It was a cheap shot’

Glamour boy: Brian O’Driscoll

Greatest Moment: Triple Crown winners for last two years running

Weakest Moment: Losing to France in the dying minutes of the 2007 Six Nations, thus ruining their best chance ever to date of winning the tournament.

Weak link: Ronan O’Gara’s tackling

Redeeming features: Keith Wood – ex captain and now star commentator. He even cried on telly in the last world cup when Ireland lost to Oz. A man that in not afraid to show his emotions and has a nice shiny head to boot. Great for Ireland and great for rugby.

Incumbent star: Paul O’Connell

Rising star: Gordon D’Arcy

loose canon bernard laporte

The Rugby World Cup hasn’t begun yet and already Bernard Laporte, the French coach with his foot and mouth tendencies, has landed himself in controversy with a couple of clangers. The first was his threat on Australian ref Stu Dickenson in an Auckland hotel. Larporte was reportedly very angry at the way Dickinson refereed the first test between the All Blacks and France in June. The French coach was overheard implying in no uncertain terms that he could put an end not just to Dickinson’s games allotted in the World Cup but also, his career.

Just when you hope the bald bespectacled one may have taken a chill pill a month out from the world cup, off he goes again. This time he implies that the English and New Zealand rugby teams are on performance enhancing drugs. Admittedly – both teams look rather bulky – but no more muscular and thick necked than say France, Australia or South Africa. The English have already leapt into damage control refuting the French claims, saying theirs is the only union with a full time doping officer. It will be interesting to see what the NZRFU come up with. It is not the first time the French coach and media have taken a pot shot at the All Blacks regarding doping. Last year a French newspaper ran an article about an AB testing positive for cannabis. We never did find out who that All Black was, or how the newspaper believed cannabis could possibly be performance enhancing.

england 62 – wales 5

Meanwhile - way, way up in the Northern Hemisphere, the hopeful British media witnessed an English renaissance of sorts against a second string Welsh team at Twickers. I was disappointed to miss this build up match to the world cup ‘friendly’ on Saturday.

The English sounded like they have experienced a turn around under the inspirational Ashton, who I greatly admire. He seems to me a man that thinks outside the box and that is just what England need after the conservative approach of poor old Andy whathisface (oops sorry, forgotten his name already.)

I can’t understand why England persist with loud mouth Dallaglio however. I’m glad that Nick Easter – Dallaglio’s main rival for the England No.8 jersey - scored four tries. England needs more new blood. And I think Dallaglio is a disruptive influence to their team with his continued blabbing and general love affair with his own voice. (I can’t forgive him his past disloyalty to Martin Corey, to me he is not a team man).

Great to see Jonny Wilkinson back and it appears the injury cloud hanging over him these last few years has blown away. I hope it remains so. The rugby world is a better place when Wilkinson is fit and firing.

As for Wales, whether it was a second string team (what a boring excuse) or not, I have thought for some time that under Jenkins they have lost their potency. I still don’t understand the palaver with Mike Ruddock and why he was made to leave in the first place, but the team was always going to suffer that dumb decision. I think upcoming World Cup tournament will be the most disappointing one for the Welsh yet.

poor old piri

Interesting to note that Piri Weepu could not match the scintillating form he displayed from the previous week against Otago when Wellington played the Hawkes Bay. I can understand why he was fired up and played out of his skin last weekend, but his return to match sluggishness against the Magpies on Saturday proves to me that he doesn’t deserve to be in the ABs. I know I am probably the only person (along with Graham Henry) that thinks this. But the guy has not been great this year and it is a bore listening to everyone (the media) go on and on about the injustice for poor old Piri. I can wager that Weepu will end up going to the World Cup anyway. All it takes is one of the chosen three half backs to twist an ankle, and Weepu will be packing his bags for Paris (unfortunately).

magpies, logs of wood and an upset

I’m in a lull before the rugby world cup tournament begins next month. Not being a provincial rugby supporter of sorts, I was still interested and pleased for the Hawkes Bay Magpies defeating a Wellington Lions outfit that would have been expecting to walkover the boys from the East Coast. Good on the Magpies for showing that even though the provinces may lose all their stars to the bright lights and ‘big city’ franchises – they can still mix it up with the big boys.

The same can’t be said for my spiritual home team – Taranaki. Although the men from under the mountain put up an excellent fight against North Harbour on Saturday for the log of wood, it was Harbour that retained the shield by a slither of a score (six points in fact). Better luck next time the ‘Naki.